Many people feel unhappy in their lives and they want things to be different. The first major step to change involves making one important connection. Realising that the only person you can change is yourself. From there, the rest is easy! Okay, maybe not easy. But if you spend your days blaming everyone around you for your own unhappiness, you’ll have a hard time moving forward.

Change is something that can be very scary. Even if we are doing negative things over and over, knowing they are not helping us, we continue. Often because it’s familiar, the familiar can be very comforting. The unknown is scary and what proof do we have that we’ll be any better off? The truth is, you don’t. But a good indicator that things may need changing is how happy you feel, how truly happy you feel. Ask yourself some important questions:

  • Are there a long list of things you want to change in your life?
  • Do you feel there is something lacking, an emptiness within you?
  • Do you assume everyone hates their job/living situation/life?

Maybe you are surrounded by friends and family who like yourself, feel that life is crap. To be completely honest, I would answer ‘no’ to all of the above questions. I love my life and in the past if I didn’t, I changed it. But I first had to start asking the hard questions and answer honestly.


You don’t have to be miserable and not everyone is. However, ‘misery loves company’ so those really negative people can bring you down. They can make you feel as though happiness isn’t attainable. I promise you it is. But it starts with yourself. You need to look at your thoughts and feelings and decide if you want to continue on the path you are on.

All you need to do is begin to notice how you speak to yourself about the world around you. Maybe you’ve been looking through a negative lens for so long you weren’t aware things could be different. Awareness seems like such a small step, but it is so important. You cannot change that which you aren’t aware of. Once you have gained awareness then speaking negative is a choice. Once again the responsibility is on you to change.

Good luck and remember, awareness isn’t about beating yourself up for being (or not being) a certain way. It’s about noticing something and saying ‘Hmm, that’s interesting.’

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”  – C.G. Jung

Time to Declutter

Welcome to January, the Monday of the year. Step one is to ignore any of the adverts and articles that make you feel bad about yourself. Step two is to do something that makes you feel good.

Decluttering is a great way to feel a sense of accomplishment. Start with 1 cupboard or closet, not the whole house. If you start too big then if you run out of time or energy you’ll be disappointed that you didn’t finish. This website aptly named has tips for organisation and how to declutter most spaces.  Here you can read on why it’s important to have less clutter in your life and house as well as lots of advice on what to do to get started.

Karen Kingston the author of  Clear Your Clutter With Feng Shui writes “When all your available space is filled with clutter, there is no room for anything new to come into your life. Your thoughts tend to dwell in the past, and you feel bogged down with problems that have dogged you for some time. You tend to look back rather than forward in your life, blaming the past for your current situation rather than taking responsibility for creating a better tomorrow.”

Holding onto items of the past which hold emotional meaning for us means we’re stuck in that time. It’s difficult to move forward when everything in your house ties you to the past. In the present your surrounded by stuff that may not have use for you anymore. As a culture we often link our identity to things. ‘Look how successful I am, I have lots of stuff.’

I don’t want my legacy to be a house full of stuff. I want it to be that I was a good person, surrounded by love. That cannot be stuffed in a pantry.

Starting today try to part with the items you haven’t used, the clothes you haven’t worn and the papers you won’t read. Not only will you feel a sense of accomplishment but you can feel a sense of letting go.

While you start this I recommend listening to some supportive music that allows you to enjoy clearing a space. The chorus of this song is ‘keep your head up, keep your heart strong.’ Words that can prove remarkably beneficial.

Make 2014 the year you work on you for you. Do something you feel good about.

“Freedom…is the act of releasing ourselves from the bondage of that which keeps us from living the life we were meant to live.” – Kelli Wilson