Many people feel unhappy in their lives and they want things to be different. The first major step to change involves making one important connection. Realising that the only person you can change is yourself. From there, the rest is easy! Okay, maybe not easy. But if you spend your days blaming everyone around you for your own unhappiness, you’ll have a hard time moving forward.
Change is something that can be very scary. Even if we are doing negative things over and over, knowing they are not helping us, we continue. Often because it’s familiar, the familiar can be very comforting. The unknown is scary and what proof do we have that we’ll be any better off? The truth is, you don’t. But a good indicator that things may need changing is how happy you feel, how truly happy you feel. Ask yourself some important questions:
- Are there a long list of things you want to change in your life?
- Do you feel there is something lacking, an emptiness within you?
- Do you assume everyone hates their job/living situation/life?
Maybe you are surrounded by friends and family who like yourself, feel that life is crap. To be completely honest, I would answer ‘no’ to all of the above questions. I love my life and in the past if I didn’t, I changed it. But I first had to start asking the hard questions and answer honestly.
You don’t have to be miserable and not everyone is. However, ‘misery loves company’ so those really negative people can bring you down. They can make you feel as though happiness isn’t attainable. I promise you it is. But it starts with yourself. You need to look at your thoughts and feelings and decide if you want to continue on the path you are on.
All you need to do is begin to notice how you speak to yourself about the world around you. Maybe you’ve been looking through a negative lens for so long you weren’t aware things could be different. Awareness seems like such a small step, but it is so important. You cannot change that which you aren’t aware of. Once you have gained awareness then speaking negative is a choice. Once again the responsibility is on you to change.
Good luck and remember, awareness isn’t about beating yourself up for being (or not being) a certain way. It’s about noticing something and saying ‘Hmm, that’s interesting.’
“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” – C.G. Jung